culture · identity · relationships

finding hope in genesis

Somehow I always knew I would be a mom. I remember when I was in college I had this weird dream about all of a sudden getting pregnant and as soon as I woke up, I knew it’d be in my future. Weird, right?

The years passed by without even an inkling of a husband on the horizon, and sooner or later, I began to wonder if that dream was all just a funny hoax. Was it something I wanted and God was saying no? Or was I simply being impatient because my expectations weren’t being met? I was left frustrated and confused, but at the same time, hopeful.

Even after I got married in 2018 and Joe and I started dreaming about our future family, I still felt like there could be something more; we cried and had more “loud conversations” than we’d care to admit, but somehow we knew God was going to do the miraculous: we’d just have to wait.

I can only imagine how impatient Abraham and Sarah became as year after year, decade after decade passed without God’s promise coming to fruition. The Lord Himself had told them they would conceive and bear children, and they would be children of His everlasting promise and covenant (Genesis 17:3-6). The only problem with this? God never specified a timeline. And that must’ve sucked.

I know for us, it was horrible enduring month after month with negative pregnancy tests. We began to lose all hope, and our faith was severely dwindling. We may not have received an audible covenant like Abraham and Sarah, but there was something in our hearts calling us to keep going; to keep on waiting.

It took them twenty-five years of waiting before God’s promise finally came true. You guys. I don’t know if I could wait that long and still remain faithful! However, because Abraham and Sarah walked with God and lived by faith, they were rewarded innumerably. Literally!

Their story reminds me that patience truly is a virtue. God puts hard things in our lives not to test us, but to grow us. As we (try to) patiently wait for our little bundle of blessings to arrive in July, the only thing we can do right now is lean on His promises: that He always provides, always loves, always protects. His “always” is so much greater because He is a God that never fails (Joshua 21:45).

If you feel like you’re fighting a losing battle, be reminded of and be encouraged by these lyrics from Elevation Worship’s song See A Victory. It’s been my anthem since January 1st, and I have a feeling it’s going to be the story of our lives:

The weapon may be formed, but it won’t prosper
When the darkness falls, it won’t prevail
‘Cause the God I serve knows only how to triumph
My God will never fail
Oh, my God will never fail

I’m gonna see a victory
I’m gonna see a victory
For the battle belongs to You, Lord
I’m gonna see a victory
I’m gonna see a victory
For the battle belongs to You, Lord