identity · relationships

and if not, He is still good.

Oh how Satan fights against us.

Recently Joe and I have been wrestling with all sorts of things, ranging from unfair practices to personal life roadblocks and questions no human being could ever fully answer. There have been tears. Oh so many tears. And the pain has been almost unbearable. But through it all, our God is still good. We have seen blessings poured out in between sobs, sunshine while it rains, and giggles drowning out torment.

Nonetheless, we’ve also felt heartbreak. We’ve understood loss, combated temptation, and have heard constructive criticism that broke us down instead of building us up.

It begs to ask the question, why do we experience these things? If we have a God who desires to give us good gifts (Matthew 7:11), then why are we left feeling empty, alone, tired, hurt, and upset?

This is one of the toughest battles I’m continually up against. If you think about it, the root of this question isn’t about our feelings. It’s about the desires of our hearts to more fully understand God. We are asking why is God doing this? or what is God’s plan for my life? and that stems from an imperfect vision of our perfect God.

The way I see it, we are focusing too much on our circumstances and too little on the God that has control of them. We freak out every time something doesn’t go our way and we are so easy to forget that none of it matters in the first place; I at least know that’s true for me!

Through these recent challenges, the Lord has slowly but surely begun to reveal to me my earnest lack of faith in not only His timing, but also His power. I have a tattoo on my wrist that means “God is greater than the ups and downs”, but while it’s so close to my heart, it can easily slip my mind. The more I am reminded by my serious shortcoming of belief, however, the more I thank Him for His gift of grace. I may not understand what He’s doing, but He does.

This week, instead of asking the Lord to answer my begging to rule over my own life, I want to focus on His goodness. The more I understand the wisdom that comes from that, the better off my faith will be.

Friends, know that we serve a God who gives us a salvation that grants us what we ask if His words abide in us (John 15:7). Know that He hears us and answers our prayers. But even if he doesn’t answer them just the way we like, He is still good.